"How old are you?"

"I'm four and a half."

You're never 36 and a half . . . you're four and a half going on 5.

You get into your teens. Now, they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number.

"How old are you?"

"I'm gonna be 16."

You could be 12, but you're gonna be 16. Eventually. Then, the great day of your life . . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. You BECOME 21 . . . Yes!

Then, you turn 30. What happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk which needs to be thrown out. He TURNED. What's wrong? What changed? You BECOME 21; you TURN 30.

Then, you're PUSHING 40.

You REACH 50 and, then, you MAKE IT to 60.

By then, you've built up so much speed, you HIT 70.

After that, it's a day-by-day thing. You HIT Wednesday . . . You get into your 80's; you HIT lunch, you HIT 4:30. My Grandmother won't even buy green bananas. "Well, it's an investment, you know, and maybe a bad one." And it doesn't end there.

Into the 90's, you start going backwards.

"I was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens; if you make it over 100, you become a little kid again.

"I'm 100 and a half."

Happy aging! And remember . . . growing old is only mind over matter - if you don't mind . . . it doesn't matter.

~By George Carlin~

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