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Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky

to have a sweet thang like you.

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Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's

and without all them fleas.

 

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You move like the bass,
which excites me in May.
You ain't got no scales

but I luv you anyway.

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Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"

right out of the can.

 

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You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high

when we're in a crowd.

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On special occasions
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,

and awed by yore charms.

 

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Still them fellers at work
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve

such a purty, young doe.

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Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles

and fix what you can.

 

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Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants

I found in my bed.

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Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life more

than a fresh load of dirt.

 

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When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete;

Ain't nuttin' I lack.

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Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,

yore age, it keeps hidin'.

 

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Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together

like a skunk goes with stank.

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Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,

it's romantic that way.

 

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Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger.

That's impressive," I say.

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Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"

they explain, suave and couth.

 

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But for this man, honey,
these just won't do.
Cause yo're too special,

you sweet thang you.

heartsCLR.gif (9464 bytes)


I got you a gift,

without taste nor odor,
More useful than diamonds...

it's a new troll'n motor!!

 

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