What Is A Bachelor?

 

  • One who avoids Bride-Eyed women.

  • One who believes in Life, Liberty and the Happiness of Pursuit.

  • One who believes in Wine, Women and So-Long.

  • One who believes that one can live as cheaply as two.

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  • One who can forget his mistakes.

  • One who can get into bed from either side.

  • One who can go fishing anytime, until he gets hooked.

  • One who can have a girl on his knee without having her on his hands.

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  • One who can leave his socks and wallet lying around the house.

  • One who can tell his symptoms to his Doctor without having his wife interrupt.

  • One who can't be Spouse-Broken.

  • One who can't stand the strain of a wife.

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  • One who cheated some woman out of a divorce.

  • One who doesn't have to leave the party when he starts having a good time.

  • One who failed to embrace his opportunities.

  • One who is a free male.

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  • One who is allergic to Wedding cakes.

  • One who is Foot-Loose and Family-Free.

  • One who is known as a Dame Dropper.

  • One who is not missing anything in life except a few buttons on his shirt.

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  • One who knows all the ankles.

  • One who knows how to hold a woman's hand so that she doesn't get a grip on him.

  • One who knows if he has a steady girl on the string he may wind up on a leash.

  • One who knows more about Women than Men. That's why he is a Bachelor.

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  • One who leans toward a woman but not far enough to fall.

  • One who likes his Girl Friend just the way she is...Single!!!!

  • One who looks, but does not leap.

  • One who never chases a woman he couldn't outrun.

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  • One who never knows whom the next kiss is coming from.

  • One who never makes the same mistake once.

  • One who never met a girl he couldn't live without.

  • One who never Mrs. Anything.

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  • One who never says, "I'll Give You A Ring Tomorrow!"

  • One who plays the game of love and manages to retain his amateur outstanding.

  • One who prefers ripe tomatoes with little dressing.

  • One who thinks he is a thing of Beauty and a Boy forever.

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  • One who travels fastest in a parked car.

  • One who tries to avoid the issue.

  • One who usually has his hands full trying to loosen a woman's grip.

  • One who wakes up in the morning with all of the blankets.

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  • One who washes only one set of dishes.

  • One who when a girl asks him for a Diamond Ring, he turns Stone-Deaf.

  • One who when he opens the window in his apartment, more dust blows out than in.

  • One who won't take `Yes' for an answer.

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  • One who would rather change girls than change their names.

  • One who would rather cook his own goose.

  • One who would rather have a woman on his mind than on his neck.

  • One who would rather mend his socks than his ways.


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