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Exclamations:

"Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!"

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"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit."

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"Ahm fixin ta do that"

 

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Threats:

"I'll slap you so hard, when you wake up, your clothes will be outta style."

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"This'll jar your preserves."

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"Don't you be makin' me open
a can o' whoop-ass on ya!"

 

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Compliments:

"Cute as a sack full of puppies."

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"If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it."

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"Gooder than grits."

 

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The Weather:

"It's so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs."

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"It's been hotter'n a goat's butt
in a pepper patch."

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Wintery roads are said to be
"slicker than otter snot."

 

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Descriptions:

A bothersome person is
"like a booger that you can't thump off."

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When something is bad then you say,
"that ain't no count."

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If something is hard to do, it's
"like trying to herd cats."

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"He ran like his feet was on fire
and his butt was catchin."

 

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Insults:

"She's uglier than homemade soap."

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"Your momma's so fat,
when she stepped up on the scale to be weighed,
it said 'To be continued'."

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"He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down."

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"Uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits."

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"The wheels still turning, but the hamsters dead."

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Any insulting statement is always followed by "bless his/her heart." like:
"She's dumber than a door knob,
bless her heart."

 

hillbilly-moonshineanim.gif (1407 bytes)  hillbilly-moonshineanim.gif (1407 bytes)   hillbilly-moonshineanim.gif (1407 bytes)

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